Bruce Kent is the author of this site. He is married with five grown up children and lives with his wife in the greater Bristol area of England. He was an ordained minister for many years but resigned from active ministry in 2000 and took up full time employment with his Local Authority. He is now happily retired.
At last, after 40+ years of searching for a meaning for everything that I see going on around me, I have come to, at least a measure of peace in my own mind. I have spent the best part of my life looking and longing, always hoping that "just around the corner" I would find what I was looking for that would make me happy.
I have stopped that fruitless searching.
Like all of us, I am a man of my time. Influenced by Christians from various denominations and persuasions as well as non-Christians. I have fought my way free of many errors. These, I have found, are not limited to fringe Christian sects (and I was a member and minister of one of those) but also sadly, they characterise mainstream Christian denominations of the 21st century.
They are powerful chains that bind us. They hold us in cruel spiritual, emotional, mental and physical bondage and their power source is twofold:
1. Root lies. These are the fundamental untruths that give us our worldview. They set the paradigm that proscribes for us how we view all future knowledge - making it fit into that worldview. If that primary foundation is off base then everything we build upon it is unstable.
2. Fear. This is the force that prevents us from asking fundamental questions. Once we start to question one doctrine it affects others. It takes a brave person indeed to hold onto their confidence and say "Whatever road this leads me down I will pursue truth. Even if it leads me to be considered a heretic or mad by my contemporaries."
If I have anything to commend me it is the fact that I won't give up on the truth. I love it. I'm no longer afraid of pursuing it no matter where it leads me. I believe in truth. I think that God has put something in each one of us that is a part of his own nature that will not settle for anything short of the truth. Deep down inside each one of us, we want the truth and ultimately nothing short of that (no matter how soothing and sweet sounding) will satisfy.
Oh, and by the way, the truth is good. Because the cosmos is in the hands of a God who is all-powerful and all-loving and has made all of mankind for a supremely joyful destiny.
This paper is simply my attempt to put together some of the thoughts and conclusions that I have come to over the years as I have struggled to understand what my life here on earth is all about.
It's about God and what I understand Him to be. I realise now, He's more wonderful than I ever imagined. He's bigger than I ever imagined. He is most excellent and wonderful and loveable. He is love and he is truth. He is God and I'm sure I don't know more than an infinitely small fraction of how great he is!
I am more in awe of the magnificent heart of Jesus than ever before. He knew what it was to stand alone, rejected and vilified by all, friends and foe alike. Yet he was perfect love. Tenderly compassionate towards the weak yet lovingly stern towards the religious hypocrites around him. Unwaveringly, he stood firm in his devotion and obedience to the Father.
I will admit that I have been through many moments when I have wished that I didn't question everything. When I wished that I could just accept what my denomination tells me and be a good little soldier. I have felt despair and discouragement and deep loneliness as well as frustration and anger. But I will tell you now, I don't regret a thing. I have learned things that make my heart sing with praise and love for Jesus. His wonderful plan of salvation for all mankind is awesomely majestic. It is cosmically complete and utterly magnificent.